Today I got to teach my cute Young Women the lesson on 'Women and the Priesthood' {Manual 1 Lesson 16}.
They were so much fun to make that I was just itching for an excuse to use them again.
Which is why....when I saw that the title of my lesson included the word 'Priesthood'...I knew I just had to bust them back out. Because seriously. Mustache = Boys which = Priesthood. Right?!? Right.
I used the chocolate mint Wilton wafers. Mmmmmm......
Very Cute. I love your ideas!
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ReplyDeleteI like the first part, hate the second. Girls and women can not control the thoughts of anyone, let alone boys with surging hormones. Girls have enough problems in this day and age, asking them to do the impossible (police the thoughts and actions of boys) isnt' right. I love so much of the church, but this idea that is permeating the church that girls have to protect the viture of boys worries me.
ReplyDeleteI like the overall idea of "You mustache yourself a question" and the matching lollipop...but the content is awful. Please do not teach the young women that they are responsible for someone else's behavior and actions. That is setting them up for boundary failure and codependency. Not to mention, promoting rape culture. I know it seems cute at a glance, but the covert message is insidious and wrong, wrong, wrong. I would be extremely upset if my daughter came home with the idea in her head.
ReplyDeleteAnd I'd be upset if my son ever believed that he wasn't solely responsible for his own thoughts and actions, no matter what anyone else is doing. This message to harmful to both the young men and the young women. They should be focused on their relationships with Christ.
While I appreciate the time invested in the YW, the content of this handout makes me uncomfortable. No matter how much we love others, we can not control their behavior. It is damaging to teach that we can. We are all responsible for our own choices. There are no loop holes in living the Gospel.
ReplyDeleteAs a Mormon woman who has been married to a Mormon man who has had an addiction to pornography and other "adult" issues, this breaks my heart. It has taken me almost 17 years of abuse, apologies, more abuse, him laying the blame on me, and counseling, counseling, and more counseling to finally admit that IT IS NOT MINE OR ANY YOUNG WOMAN'S RESPONSIBILITY TO HELP OR MAKE A MAN HONOR HIS PRIESTHOOD! If a man doesn't value the CHURCH enough to honor his priesthood, then he needs to reassess his values and goals. My daughters will be taught that they are responsible for themselves and that NO ONE can or should ever blame their shortcomings on another human being. This note is gut wrenching to me. It's equivalent to faulting a woman for getting raped or assaulted. If she had acted/talked/dressed differently, then the man wouldn't have done things to her. It makes me ill.
ReplyDeleteThis handout is harmful to our young women, and even our young men. Young women have no responsibility whatsoever for the virtue of young men, nor how they honor their priesthood. Men are responsible for their thoughts and actions, just as women are. I would be very upset if my daughters came home with a handout that suggested something like this. During the years that they are involved in the YW program girls should be focused on developing a relationship with their Savior, getting to know themselves, and become the best person they can be. Not worrying about how anything they may be doing is affecting a young man or his future.
ReplyDeletePlease don't give these out anymore! Teach the girls self-worth... Teach them to love themselves. Don't teach them that their worth depends on how they are seen by priesthood holders. Trust me..that will do far more lasting damage.
ReplyDeleteI wish I would have had more lessons about my self-worth back then. I think we all could use more self-esteem boosts and less guilt and shame.
ReplyDeleteI just want to say to Marci, obviously this idea has made the rounds on some Mormon Mom boards, hence the sudden multiple comments. I want to say that despite the concern about this particular idea, you ARE an amazing YW leader. Its obvious you spend lots of time and energy making your girls feel loved and appreciated. You have a LOT of really fun ideas, too! I just think its very easy to get caught up in the 'cute' and maybe not think too deeply about the little saying that's on it, and how it could be portraying some damaging ideas. So maybe just take some time to really analyze the purpose behind the quote, saying, lesson idea, etc...before jumping into the part you do really, really well, which is making it cute and fun. :) This calling is so precarious because it IS so important, and it can be very uplifting or very damaging. And these ideas spread like wildfire once they hit Pinterest, so its very important to make sure there are no misogynistic messages in it before we share them. Its easy to make that mistake because its the society/culture we grew up in, but we need to do better by our girls.
ReplyDelete^ I love this last comment. I hope that you don't feel attacked, Marci! I am sure that you are an amazing young women's teacher, you obviously put a lot of time and effort into your lessons. But, yes, I second the idea that the message is more important, no matter how adorable those mustaches may be. ;)
ReplyDeleteI think one small word has been overlooked here and it totally changes the context of the message. The word HELP does not imply that it is the responsibility of the young women to defend or honor the priesthood or virtue of the young men. This simply acknowledges that the choices that individuals make (in this case a YW because that's who she is targeting with her message)CAN impact another. Of course, agency belongs to each individual, but we all know that how an individual acts, dresses and talks can impact another. It does not place blame, it calls for support. I believe this message is simply saying... be aware and do your best in this matter. Secondly, we were not present during the lesson and cannot know the tone or comments expressed. There is no doubt in my mind that this young woman leader not only supports and encourages self worth, but is a source of great strength for her young women organization. Thanks for your continued hard work Marci. :)
ReplyDeleteThank you Busy Bee. You took my thoughts and put them into words perfectly!!! xoxo
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